9 things I hate

I could start and end this post by only stating all the subjects I'm having exam this week and other school related stress I have right now, which I hate. But because I know that nobody likes gramming (well at least no one sane from majority of people), I don't want to bore you with it. Instead I'm going to complaing all the other things I right now and always hate.

1. The fact that I have no technical skills at all. Or more like I don't have the nerves to learn technical things. I prefer just somebody else doing them for me. Everything I can do with my computer (or any other technical device for that matter) is that I can open some simple programs and use them to the simple extent. My photoediting is at its babysteps for this same reason, I'm just too lazy to learn it. I just prefer doing taking good pictures so that I don't have to edit. Or painting and drawing by hand instead of using computer programs. That is why I used to do all my blog headings by hand from the very beginning. This is also the reason why my blog is not as pretty as it could be, I just hate HTML-codes, hate them.

2. Pickels. (I have no idea how this got lost at first). I hate everything that has been canned, with vinegar mostly. Vinegar makes me sick from my stomach. And I just can't stand the fact that our school puts pickles in the freaking fresh salad! It is like mixing ice-cream, mämmi and onions, just gross.

3. That people wear leggings without pants or long (actually ass-covering) shirt, skirt or a dress. 

I think I don't have to explain this any further...

4. People that do not have any opinions. It is a serious drag to try and have nice conversation with person who always answers "I don't know". Fundamental lack of opinions just makes me hate people, because it makes me think that they are actually so lazy that they don't even think. And the most annoying people are those who do not think.

5. People who do not follow the rules. As said before. I don't mean rules such as stupid junior high rules "you have to go out even when it is -30 degrees celcius", but kind of that people have agreed to do something together and then people do not go as planned.

"who cares" attitude really annoys me.

6. Horror movies. Yep. I'm sissy, but one was enough to make me hate them. The Strangers kept me up 2 nights in row. Never again. Not even oes that have supernatural things. If it says horror, it is not for me.

7. The sound of the Storage Wars actioneer when he is taking the bids/auctioning. I just have to turn my television mute everytime he opens is mouth. Otherwise I sometimes watch the show in my boredom while waiting something else to start or while I'm being bored to death when I'm sick.

8. Distance between me and my best friend. I was going to put her in some other part of this challenge because this is the darkest part of it, but decided that this is worth of mentioning because I hate it so much. It is the thing that makes me feel most alone sometimes. I just wish she could be there when I really do not want to talk to anyone, because in the whole world she understands it somehow the best. I also would love to be there for her bad days. As I am really bad in texting and chatting, I sometimes wonder whether she knows how much I love her with all my heart. And I hate that feeling too.

9. Books where in the end the protagonist dies or which end unhappily. I know that some books need this to make it good, but I just don't like ending book feeling sad. That is why David Nicholls's One Day is still on my sad book -list and I'm not sure if I like it. I guess I have hate/love affair with these kind of books. 

© Susa
(good example of technically lazy me, all done my marker and hand)

Little something

I think that the most important thing in this planet are us, people, and the choices we make. I think we are the problem and the solution to many things, and in order to influence us we have to gain more understanding of who we are, and try and influence on each other the best possible way.

By these two things I'm aiming at my ambitions as humanist. I really hope and someday I could influence and/or understand people little bit more than I do now. I wish that psychology and other human sciences could someday reach the level of natural sciences in explaining what we are and why. And at the same time I'm intrigued by the fact that we maybe never will understand ourselves as we do understand others. Little part of me wishes it would stay that way.

We know why rains starts, or the winter comes, or even more cliche, we know that the earth is not flat. We think we know how people around us are alike. Some are funny and some are shy, some are social butterflies, some are throughoutly evil and others have good heart. We think we know everything about what is happening around us, or think that we can someday know.  But what we in so many cases do not understand, or what is the most harderst to understand is who we ourselves are. It is easier to describe your best friend than say what kind of person I myself am.

I have always been hugely interested in people. I think they are the most facinating thing this world has to offer. They all have their past, their future, their present. Their ideas, emotions, opinions are all different and yet somehow most of them are right, in their own little universe. There is no right way to see the world, I guess. I wish that I could someday be part of someone's live through helping them as psychologist or influencing on their view of world by writing/photographing/saying something that made them feel something or think in new ways.Only time will so me will I ever do that.

Today I got selected as the editor of the school magazine, which for the first time in my time in that school, has as big group as it has now. Being selected made me think about Gilmore Girls' Rory and how I admired her in the series. I know that being the editor of our school's paper is nothing like being editor on American private school's paper or colleges paper, but I'm still proud to have this opportunity. And I'm really excited about all of this and that was what triggered me to write little bit more about what I have stuck in my head. I think that this magazine will be really cool, all the ideas in people minds which got out in our meeting, were amazing.

I'm really sorry about all the grammar and typing mistakes, I'm writing this in a dark bus on my way to Kotka and five star treatment with my best girl Kerttuli!

Tired.

Sleeping seems not to be enough, I need vacation, a long one.
I long to the sun, adventures and laughter. I want to spend time with my friends and not to worry about school and other stress. I want to learn about people firsthand, not from the book in the libary, where my eyes only drift observing other people, and I cannot ask them what are they doing. I cannot just stay and stare at them. And it's not just because that would be rude but also that I need to get my eyes back to the book and understand what other people have found and think about the world.

I have come to the realization that the school might not be the best thing for me. I strongly agree with people who say that schooling system is not educating us but rather shoveling information down our throats. I should remember tens of quotes from four Finnish prose books, names of researchers, dates and word lists that I will never use in real life. And mostly I don't even have a choice of doing otherwise. Either school, it will be the same.

If you do not almost drown in the pool of information and somehow survive, you won't be able to get in university, not a good job and that means that you will be nothing. It doesn't matter that I have learned to deal with my stress, I know how to get on with almost everyone if I need to or that I'm so interested about things, but never really got to do/learn it my way.

It is funny because I (and everybody else) do this just to get to play in my own rules in the future. At least to some extent.

One of the best spend weekends in my life

I have been now home for little more than one day. And it has been weird. It is a whole new world in EYP sessions... I don't need to say, but it was AWESOME. I'm now hoping good news from the selection results.

First day was a lot of new people and definitely alot of new experiences! Right from the beginning the Session was really formal and the opening ceremony followed official protocols, which was kind of fun since it made me feel so important. First day mostly was only about getting to know each other and teambuilding, which was great since the topics on the next days were so hard to handle that you really needed to know the people around to so that you know how to work together to tackle those huge globally influencing issues.So it was all about Fred the Moose and Drunken Bottles and being silly and crazy on the first days.

The secong day of our EYP session we got into really working and discussing. Our committee of 11 people and chairman and journalist talked about climate change: From Durban to Doha: international climate talks have so far been a series of high-profile failures. With no conclusive agreement in sight and the goal of keeping the increase in global average temperature below 2 degrees becoming impossible to achieve, where should the EU lie in climate policy?

Engaging myself to talk about such an important issue as climate change wasn't hard. Brainstroming the problems and facts about climate change on the otherhand increased my comprehension of the wideness of the issue at hand. There was so much to talk about and everyone in our committee wanted to emphasize completely different kinds of matters. Some of us thought more globaly, some of us wanted to focus on the individuals. The more we got into the topic, the more my head got confused and I really realized how big the issue was. And I wrote about page long report about that on my CAS reflection... And that tells a lot! :D

General Assembly on next day was A LOT of discussing. At some point it felt like it would never end. But I loved it. Even tho I stood up and said my opinion only twice (and after that once to give a speech), because of my terrible stage fright, I enjoyed every minute of seeing and listening everyone else talk. It gave me so much new to think about.

All in all, the experience was eye-opening and life changing, and left me want more. I miss sleeping on the floor and being with the people are in some ways so much like I am. And even thought the resolutions were hard to make, it feeled like doing something great, something bigger than myself. Especially when I walked to the lectern and spoke all more than 100 pairs of ears and addressed our point.

My fellow delegate from my school, and my dear new(ish) friend!

I will add more photos, when I got them from our journalist and if he lets me to post them :)